Dippitty Doo And How 'Bout You?
"Doctor! There's something terribly wrong with my HANDS!"
"You Hands, eh? Let me see . . . One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, and Ten . . . You haven't lost any fingers messing around with that Band Saw."
"Doctor, it's my FINGERS! They're all . . . "
"Maybe if you turned off that stupid Band Saw I could here what you're saying."
"Oh . . . Doctor, My Hands . . . "
"No, no . . . The Song goes 'Doctor my EYES . . .' "
"No, Doctor, it's my Hands . . . "
"Oh! You've come down with a case of 'Dippitty Doo Do Nut Fingers'!"
"'Dippitty Doo Do Nut Fingers'?"
"Yes, you have been eating Dippitty Doo Do Nuts and now your fingers are all sticky and stuck up with all that Dippitty Doo Deliciousness!"
"Well, I'll be!"
"You'll be in the Bathroom washing your Hands and then you will be Writing out a Check to me for Eight Hundred Dollars."
"Eight Hundred Dollars!?!"
"Make sure you wash all that Dippitty Doo Delight of your fingers before you Write that Check. The last time I made a Bank Deposit the Teller thought it was a Jelly Do Nut with Sprinkles and tried to eat it!"
"I can't hear you, Doc! I'm in the Bathroom washing my Hands!"
"Stupid Teller choked on the Check! I would have performed the Heinlich Maneuver but Heimlich was in the Bathroom washing his Hands!"
"Excuse me, guys, but is this Commercial for Dippitty Doo Donuts almost eovr?"
"Wow, you've got a good voice! You ought to be an Announcer on Commercials!"
"His voice is so good I can hear him over here in the Bathroom!"
"DIPPITTY DOO DO NUTS! Our Do Nuts are so good you will have the most delicious Fingers in Town!"
"That's kind of a gross slogan."
"So go wash your Hands in the place across the Street!"
"Oh, okay . . . "
"DIPPITTY DOO DO NUTS! Our Do Nuts are so good. . . "
"I can still hear you!"
"Of course you can! I'm on the Radio! You can hear me all over Town!"
"Well, why don't you shut up and play a Record?"
"And now here's 'The Joker' by Steve Miller, brought to you by Dippitty Doo Do Nuts!"
"Some people call me the Space Cowboy . . . "
"Oh, Geez . . . "
"Try turning the Band Saw on again!"
"Some people call me Maurice . . . "
"Try turning on the Band Saw and that other Band Saw right over there! That Record SUCKS!"
"So the Commercial for Dippitty Doo Do Nuts is over, right?"
"Just as soon as they explain why they've got a couple of Band Saws in a Do Nut Place."
"We use em to cut the Holes in the Do Nuts!"
"You've got a good voice!"
"Thank You! That's why I'm a Announcer in Commercials!"
"I was talking to Steve Miller."
"Don't bother me, I'm right in the middle of a Song! I'm a Lover and I'm a Sinner!"
"You aren't playing Guitar very well."
"My Fingers are messed up."
"You might want to see a Doctor about that."